(ABC News)

So how did high school dropout David Karp respond to the news Yahoo had just bought his baby Tumblr for a billion in cash? With a glowing, fist pumping letter signed “fuck yeah!” BTW, he started the company just 6 years ago. What were you doing in 2007? Setting up your billion dollar windfall? Don’t worry, I’m sure he’s a total dork, except for the part where he’s handsome, seems pretty funny and has a cute girlfriend. Dick.

Abercrombie CEO, who is ugly AF, recently made headlines commenting on the hooker scented chain’s strategy of not making women’s clothing in any size above large – cuz he doesn’t want fat and ugly people to wear his clothes. Although let’s be honest, I’ve seen more attractive herpes sores. He ain’t nothing to throw parade over. Greg Karper highly disagrees. He made a two minute film where he goes to a thrift store – buys all the A&F products and distributes them to homeless people on skid row in an attempt at rebraning. #fitchthehomeless if you will. By the way, this is the Abercrombie CEO - 

Kanye West has named his new album 'Yeezus', the follow upt to Dark Twisted Fantasy. It apparently will be released June 18^th and the title which has yet to be confirmed by the rapper, is probably one of the douchest in the world. 

(KABC Photo)

After years of delays, a gun law signed by Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger in 2007 is finally in effect. The law requires all new semi-automatic handguns to come equipped with a device that stamps each bullet with the gun's make, model, and serial number. The law will not be applied to any of the 1,200 guns already on the state's firearm roster, and you don’t have to worry about future gun purchases because pretty soon all firearms will be illegal in the state of CA.

The lone winning ticket of the enormous Powerball jackpot Saturday was sold at a supermarket in …where else, the creepiest state in the union, Florida. The ticket was the only one sold that matched all the numbers to win the highest Powerball jackpot in history. The chance of dying from a lightning strike is 1 in 3 million.

Fortunately, if this doesn’t make the money loving circuits in your brain seize up with sick anticipation, then you are an embarrassment to the gmabling community. No one took home the $360 million jackpot Wednesday night. The next drawing for the $550 million jackpot is tomorrow , that means it’s all yours! Again, you have a better chance of being eaten by a shark. In Riverside.

Boston bombing suspect Dzhokhar Tsarnaev left a note claiming responsibility for the April 13 attack on the Boston Marathon. . The note -- scrawled in the wall of the vessel -- said the bombings were retribution for U.S. military action in Afghanistan and Iraq, and called the Boston victims "collateral damage" in the same way Muslims have been in the American-led wars. Dzhokar said he didn't mourn older brother Tamerlan, the other suspect in the bombings, writing that by that point, Tamerlan was a martyr in paradise -- and that he expected to join him there soon. Oh, sure, if by paradise you mean he’s flossing his teeth with Satan’s crab infested ballhairs, sure. I’ll buy it. [CBS News]